Moving on

So I had a bit of time out from breastfeeding related things and have had enough time to be comfortable to start moving on. I have stopped taking motillium and am rarely expressing so I think within the week there shouldn't be much milk left. I think it's now become more important than ever to move on and focus on my whole family more than ever.

I think that my toddler is suffering from some kind of separation anxiety after this whole ordeal. I figure that for weeks now he has been pushed to the side and into his father's arms when he is used to being my number one. He has been waking screaming in the night and screaming pretty much non stop all day unless I hold him and give in to his every whim. This really isn't the most possible solution though. I did notice at the times I went in the morning when he was still in bed to avoid his tantrums of me leaving without him that his sleep became disrupted. He would wake screaming for me at night so I think like that this is another emotional issue.

At first I thought he could be sick but now I think with all these changes and a new baby he is just feeling very anxious and stressed. It's absolutely breaking my heart. He used to be my baby. We have always been thick as thieves and now I feel like I'm loosing my baby boy. I used to go into his room at night pick him up while he was asleep and cuddle him. When he went to bed I missed him and couldn't wait to see him in the morning. Now though I totally dread him waking and can't wait to send him to bed or kindy. It's just killing me.

I'm almost at breaking point and on the verge of loosing it with him. He has a biting issue has done for the last couple of months since another child bit him in our home. Today though was the straw that broke the camel's back as he bit one friends child then another's not once but twice and then came home and bit his sister. I was so angry with him I shouted at him which I'm not proud of. He was so sad to look at me he over his face with his shirt. I don't want to hate him I want to love him but I feel like I'm loosing him. I just want to pretend this isn't happening... I just want someone to end this all and bring my sweet boy back to me. I don't want to loose him too.